What jacket(s) are you wearing at the moment?

Nickb123

Well-Known Member
Aero Sunburst, visiting family in NorCal. Mom's dad is 88 and is slowing down. Not a fun time with all of the care involved.
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He's rad. Was born in Rome, married an American tourist. Ran a liquor store/Italian deli for years in the Bay Area. If there was ever a person who encapsulated generosity...
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Grandmother, to the right passed about 10 years ago. Her father (ironically) had a leather business, making saddles. She had a brother, Jack, who was killed in France after getting through the D-Day landing.
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sorry for the vent. Nice to express the lives of these fabulous people.
 
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ButteMT61

Well-Known Member
Hey @Nickb123 - I empathize my friend. Going through literal hell right now with my Mom (85) and In have to warn anyone who hasn't been there yet, it's ugly. It's sad, and it's lonely. With all the Covid, rioting, etc. this is just icing on the cake to a year I can't wait to forget. Best of luck to you friend. It's hard and until you're there, no real way to grasp how rough it is...
 

B-Man2

Well-Known Member
Hey @Nickb123 - I empathize my friend. Going through literal hell right now with my Mom (85) and In have to warn anyone who hasn't been there yet, it's ugly. It's sad, and it's lonely. With all the Covid, rioting, etc. this is just icing on the cake to a year I can't wait to forget. Best of luck to you friend. It's hard and until you're there, no real way to grasp how rough it is...
I did that with my mom and dad before they passed. It’s tough being a caregiver in some respects simply because you are the only one there, who they can vent on when they become frustrated and start to lose their freedom of driving and having to give up their home and no longer have the ability to care for themselves . As a result they lash out at the one person who is trying to help them and is trying to keep them alive .... you.
it’s a crazy dynamic that takes place. Your trying to do your best for them .. and often they are getting pissed off at you. If you’ve never been a care giver for your elderly parents , it’s difficult to understand this experience.
There’s a special place in heaven for guys like you Butte and Nicko ... Hang in there.
Cherrs
 

ButteMT61

Well-Known Member
Thanks guys. All of you. Yeah, a grown man on the verge of crying at the drop of a hat isn't what I pictured for myself at this age.
All those things you guys said are true - and the "system" isn't exactly bursting with people wanting to help - on the contrary, they demand services that we simply cannot afford without Mom losing all her assets in the process. Costs are absolutely insane, making college loans look like a pittance in comparison.
I'm scrambling now to just tread water - still have my job, home, family to contend with. Doesn't help that I have a brother who has done nothing but criticize me (and wife) and offers no help.

Apologies for hijacking this thread fellas. :(
But thanks for the positive thoughts.
 

B-Man2

Well-Known Member
Thanks guys. All of you. Yeah, a grown man on the verge of crying at the drop of a hat isn't what I pictured for myself at this age.
All those things you guys said are true - and the "system" isn't exactly bursting with people wanting to help - on the contrary, they demand services that we simply cannot afford without Mom losing all her assets in the process. Costs are absolutely insane, making college loans look like a pittance in comparison.
I'm scrambling now to just tread water - still have my job, home, family to contend with. Doesn't help that I have a brother who has done nothing but criticize me (and wife) and offers no help.

Apologies for hijacking this thread fellas. :(
But thanks for the positive thoughts.
Just one final thought . Now that both of my parents are gone, I know that while it was really difficult ... I did exactly the right thing and have no regrets . I can live with myself knowing that I did the best that I could do for them . I have no guilt or regrets. That makes my life better today. Yours will be too.... when the time comes.
 

Nickb123

Well-Known Member
Hey @Nickb123 - I empathize my friend. Going through literal hell right now with my Mom (85) and In have to warn anyone who hasn't been there yet, it's ugly. It's sad, and it's lonely. With all the Covid, rioting, etc. this is just icing on the cake to a year I can't wait to forget. Best of luck to you friend. It's hard and until you're there, no real way to grasp how rough it is...
likewise Scott. I empathize with you too my friend. This is a tough time for everyone with all of the worldly shit going on....one day at a time and positivity and love is all we can do. My poor mom, never has drawn the longer stick once in her life, is the one this is affecting the most. (Like your family, her sister is largely absent, even vindictive at times, whether by design or not. High anxiety just runs in the fam. It's wrong to even mention, but I told her I'm giving her 90% of the will alotted to me. Circumvents the familial crap.
It's her dad after all. Not to say it isn't easy not to blow one's lid. I have several times. But onwards...less tv, more yardwork and other tasks to distract. Things will get better. My mom's certainly going to Heaven. Sounds like you're doing noble work yourself.

On a positive note, I wiped my first ass the other day!
 
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